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Writer's pictureJulie Gross

Help, Lord–I’m Leaning!

Okay, I am pretty sure I have already written a blog about the following verses, but tonight, I just keep coming back around to them, and I think I need to ponder them again. I hope that’s okay with all of you! So, the verses are Proverbs 3:5-6: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” 


I think if I were to look back at the blogs I’ve written, many of them would have to deal with worry or control. Those are things I struggle with–I spend too much time worrying and too much time trying to control things I can’t control. I really am trying to give it to God and have faith, but then sometimes I go back to leaning. I start leaning on my “own understanding.” 


When I think about it, it’s really just silly. I mean, God is way bigger and way smarter and way stronger than I could ever possibly be, so why do I try to take things on that I can’t control? Seriously, I am going to be 51 years old this month, and you would think that I should know better. I mean with this much experience under my belt, I should be wiser than I was at 25, right? Not necessarily!


It really is a daily battle for me to hand over my worry and my need to control to God. Sometimes it’s multiple times a day, and some days I don’t. I just keep leaning on my own understanding, and that is so limited. Why can’t I see that? 


For example, we have our ladies’ Spring Tea and Hat Parade this Saturday, April 13 at Harvest Community Church of the Nazarene here in Mitchell, SD, and I am so excited, but here I am stuck worrying about the details, hoping it will all come together. That paired up with the things I have to grade and student conferences I have to prepare for, and I am kind of a mess. I need to stop leaning, and “in all MY ways submit to him.” I need to “Trust in the Lord with all MY heart.” 


I just need to trust and submit. Why is that so hard sometimes? 


Lord, here I am; it’s me, Julie. I’m asking you to take my worries and my need for control. Please, just take it. My mind reaches after some of those worries, but Lord, I want to give them all to you. Give me peace and clarity, and please, “make MY paths straight.” Help me to stop leaning on my understanding and to lean on you!


That’s it from me tonight, friends. I appreciate you all for reading.


Here's a picture my husband took recently of a gorgeous South Dakota sunset. The God who made that sunset is a God I want to trust!


Love,

Julie



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