Day 2: I've been having an ongoing conversation about my wardrobe choices with God. Now, if you didn't tune in yesterday, check out my blog post https://www.unfinishedwomen.com/post/in-the-details. Anyway, Julie sent me a text about what she was wearing to the Harvest Party:
Of course, I got tired last night, and I started thinking I would just wear my usual red pullover and jeans to work--not involving God in this discussion at all. That left the fun socks for #funsockFriday, #IloveJesus, to pray over. I went to bed only partially satisfied over my decision. Am I compromising my commitment to let God into the details already? Wow, that didn't take long.
When I woke up and faced my closet, an abrupt change of heart overtook me when I prayed; I pulled out my orange and white buffalo check flannel (shown below in mosaic).
I chose this image intentionally, thinking of the song "Mosaic" by Ryan Stevenson and Brian Fowler. Let me back up a bit. Mosaics are created through the pieces of broken things. Through this exploration of beauty, I feel like I am looking at myself in parts, trying to piece together how all of the parts fit to make up one me.
I like how Stevenson and Fowler's song says,
Instead of throwing me away
You clean up every jagged shape
And put a work of art together perfectly
And then You shine your light
Through my fractured lines
Nothing was wasted
You made a mosaic
A fascinating sight
In my Father's eyes
A brand new creation
You made a mosaic.
When I doubt my own beauty because of ways I have been broken in my past, God is making something new. By sharing God's word, new light is shining through the cracks of my brokenness. He sees me as His creation--perfectly imperfect, forgiven and free. I'm so humbled that God is not wasting any part of my experiences and is constantly at work to smooth out my broken and rough edges.
So, I chose the orange and white buffalo plaid flannel over a pumpkin orange tee shirt with a dark brown pumpkin print. Not at all what I planned, but I'm asking God to get into my details. Today what I learned is to trust God to redirect me when I am thinking one way but He wants me to go another. Proverbs 3:5-6 instructs,
5Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
6in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.
I have always thought of God in terms of the big moves He makes in my life--not so much in the small things. That first phrase, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart" -- all your heart -- really strikes me in this moment of reflection. I'm reminded of that trust game where people have to fall back and trust the person behind them will catch them in the fall. God is there, waiting to catch me. Not just when my heart is broken, but in all of the things my heart is invested in. "All your heart" means all in all of the places of your life, including the minor details. Wow. Why didn't I think of that before when I looked at this verse?
Thinking of my wardrobe choice last night, I was set with certainty on my red pullover, but at the last I prayed over my choice. Remembering my commitment to pray over my wardrobe for a week, I opened my mind and heart to God, asking him again to guide my apparel decisions (and I'm glad I asked for God to get involved with the details, because my orange buffalo clad plaid was festive!). When I opened my closet, I turned away from the red pullover. It wasn't appealing to me anymore, and I felt a strong pull to my orange and white buffalo plaid and pumpkin tee shirt underneath.
Weird.
I don't always understand the direction God is guiding me. More often than not, I lean on my own understanding; I'm just now realizing that. Asking God to get involved in the details shows Him I am leaning on Him for guidance. I could have worn the red pullover, but I wouldn't have been as festive. I might even have been too warm. The temperature was around 70 when we arrived at the harvest party, and I felt perfectly comfortable in my light flannel over my pumpkin tee shirt.
This one is hard for me. I am curious. I have a deep desire to understand the whys and to tease out the mysteries. God knows the answers, and He wants us to have a relationship with Him. Leaning on God shows my trust in Him, and when I try to control the details of my life instead of trusting God, things never go as I hope. I thought I was trusting God before, but the last two days have shown me I'm not finished growing my faith yet; I still have work to do in the trust department.
In the end, things worked out. That's where I like the last part of the verse:
6in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.
By submitting to God, giving in to His guidance in my daily decisions--in the small details of my life--I am finding not only some ease in my decisions, but I am also learning that letting go helps me realize a greater sense of freedom.
How did the harvest party go? Wonderful! We had so much fun with friends! Here are some picture of Julie and me, first hosting ring-around-the-pumpkin; then, on the hayride at sunset:
Post Script:
God is in the details. I didn't really realize it until this morning while writing this. When I prayed over my jewelry, I felt drawn to this particular piece:
In case you are having difficulties reading it, there is a compass on the copper piece and the statement "no matter where" on the silver medallion.
Today, as I reflect on the verse in Proverbs, I am particularly moved by the last phrase of the verse, "and he will make your paths straight." The compass stands for direction; the statement "no matter where" reinforces to me that God is always with me, directing my choices and guiding me along the path of life--if I stop leaning on my own understanding and give God the reins to reign over me. I can't get lost from Him. His guidance--even in the most trivial matters of my life--directs my path. What a comfort to know His mighty power is involved in all of these choices. What a load off of my burden!
I'm still in my pajamas as I type this, but I'm going to pray over my closet now; I will give you an update tomorrow on new ways God is directing my steps.
What a beautiful day! Trust God to guide you in the details today. Wishing you many blessings,
Michelle
Comments